If given lemons...squeeze them in a glass of vodka.

After a looong summer hangin' with the Wild Ones and caring for the MIL, I wanted to spend a day on the boat with the Big Guy-no kids, no MILs, no crowds. The first week the Wild Ones were back in school it was bitter cold and I thought we were doomed. Then the second week I actually had to go to a job-I know...how inconvenient. So this week I checked the weather, checked the schedule and said a little prayer. 

Finally, the Big Guy and I got to have our day. The night before we were going out, the Big Guy gets invited on the BFF's boat with a bunch of hoodlums...I mean guys. He comes home late, a little loopy and a poof of cigar smoke wafted over me as his head hit the pillow. If that was not bad enough (he says it could have been worse, he could have been gassy) he passes out into a full fledge "rattle the windows" snore fest spread eagle on the bed and then starts patting me. Yup you heard me right, he was patting me...my shoulder, my belly, my legs. Not romantic, definitely not "don't stop, you're turning me on and going to get lucky tonight" patting. 

So after four hours of laying there AWAKE I got up to start my day. And yes I was a little cranky. But still I was bound and determined to get out on the boat. Fast forward to two hours after we are supposed to leave and the Big Guy finally shows up (oh and by the way he forgot to ask the oldest Wild One to babysit the little ones...yup had to do that myself too). We got in the car and I decided I was going to have fun...damnit! So we got to the launch, which went smoothly, and I even parked the boat trailer all by my self...35 feet of black steel perfectly backed-evenly I might add-between the two white lines and up the hill...on the first try. And yes I stood back and gave myself a few high fives and decided this trip was lookin' better by the moment. I ran over to the boat to make sure that the Big Guy saw my handiwork and hopped aboard. We started drifting and just as I was about to make a cocktail and lounge in the sun I saw the Big Guy lean over the edge of the boat and heave...again...and again...and again. He claims food poisoning, but I have my doubts. Not to worry, we made the best of it...and I made him take me out again today...I've got the tan lines to prove it.