Black Clouds and a Rainy Day.

Waking up to the dreary rain and dark sky seems some what fitting today. I try to keep these posts upbeat and light, but some days are just dark. I am not looking for sympathy, just saying it like it is...I learned that from the Wild Ones. Last night I heard the padding of little feet in the hallway and as soon as the Wee Wild One made it around the corner I knew it was going to be a rough night. I knew that hang of his head and that look in his eyes...I knew what was coming. What I didn't know was how it would drop me to my knees. He was missing his brother and wanted to know how we could get him back. He said he knew we couldn't really get him back, but could we get another child and name him Oliver? He thought adoption would be a good idea. Then he proceeded to talk about the accident and how he wished it hadn't happened (I won't repeat his words, but he told it like it was). He was afraid to go to sleep because he thought someone else would die. We cried, snuggled and talked about life. He finally fell asleep...if not happy, at least content with our love and strength. All this came on the eve of a phone call I am dreading...the one from my mom that will end with the word "benign" or "malignant".